A Very Special Lone StarA Very Special Lone StarMy name if Jennifer and I hail from Texas – the Lone Star State. I became the woman I was meant to be so long ago, it is almost impossible for me to remember ever being that “other self.” It took a while to figure it all out of course. Most gurls know the story – discovering dad’s girly magazines, the fascination, the urge not just to look at, but to look like those beautiful women. The first foray into mom’s or sister’s closet. The breathless thrill of slipping into your first pantyhose or bra, the first touch of lipstick, the first pair of heels, most of all the first time you saw yourself in the mirror and realized the pretty thing looking back at you was the real you.College was such a wonderful period of experimentation and self-realization. It was when I (nervously) bought my own female clothes and shoes for the first time. It was then I became certain that Jeff was really Jennifer and that she would not go away. In fact, once she got a little peek at the outside world, she would not be denied at all. izmir escort I tried to put her away or relegate her to an occasional fetish, but it never worked. I even purged all her stuff a time or two. But inevitably the unquenchable need to be Jennifer always came back, and it would come back stronger and quicker each time I tried to deny her.Truth be told, I am glad I attempted to get rid of Jennifer. Because my failure to do so has affirmed that she is who I am and who I was meant to be. The fact that my desire to be a woman would never go away, but had become instinctual helped prove to me that I was never truly a Jeff, but always a Jenn. She wasn’t a fetish or some deviation on being bi or gay, but real flesh and blood femininity. Whenever I was her, I felt right and whole. Whenever I see her in the mirror or a photo, I know she is me.And I am so glad, so very glad, I embraced myself by embracing her. Jennifer started out shy and timid – uncertain of herself and how others saw her. Not quite sure she was attractive or desirable. She began life with izmir escort bayan a pink and white wardrobe and long skirts which suggested virginal purity but did not truly reflect who she was.The first boyfriends and lovers helped end that phase. I still recall those who first flirted with me and treated me as a woman, even though they knew I was a special kind of gurl. The fact that I was different and exotic made me more attractive not less. That I worked harder at being pretty and feminine and sexy than most biological women made me even more so. Once I learned that, once I was held and kissed and admired as Jennifer, my confidence grew and I fully accepted what I wanted and who I was, and will be forever more.Being a gurl today is so much easier than it was when I started. There is more acceptance, true, but more importantly there are so many more places that make the things we need and want, so many more places to buy and shop and so many more places to be ourselves. The internet has been so wonderful for women like me. Not only for the shopping escort izmir and support, but also because it’s a great place to show off – to put ourselves out there for the entire world to see. I think every gurl should have a robust on-line presence. It is exciting to post photos and stories about yourself – thrilling to know that once they are on line it can never be taken back or denied. In a way it is the ultimate act of accepting who you are and shouting it to the world. It’s also a great way to find other gurls and share your passions, travails and secrets. Furthermore, it is a fantastic means to post your confidence! When you start to get all those “likes” and messages telling you how beautiful and desirable you are… well, let’s just say it is gratifying, rewarding and such a vindication.From the shy, pink, uncertain gurl of a few decades ago, I have grown into a confident, sophisticated woman who dresses and acts in a way that isn’t afraid to call attention to herself. A Woman who has no interest in SRS because she loves being a special gurl and realizes that is a lot more appealing and enticing to a great many more people than you might think. I love being me. I love being her and more than all of that, perhaps, I love sharing Me being Her with all of you.